The Malaysian Insider

George W Bush does not have much time left. At noon on Jan 20, he will be out of office, having failed miserably to accomplish his mission.
Bush countdown clocks are among the best-selling items in most souvenir shops in Washington, a clear indicator of just how many Americans and people in a large part of the world are waiting for Bush’s days to be over.
The debate on whether Bush is the worst President in American history continues to rage. General indications are that the proponents of the motion have the upper hand. Bush’s failing are many, and the invasion of Iraq will stand out as his most stupendous failure.
Ostensibly, Bush sent his troops into Iraq because Saddam Hussain had in his possession weapons of mass destruction. The mission was to rid Iraq of these weapons and, in the process, liberate the oppressed Iraqis from the political stranglehold of a despotic leader.
The world was told that the liberating troops will be cheered on by a grateful populace, in a rerun of the liberation of France and much of Europe from the Nazis in World War II.
Bush vehemently denied that the invasion had anything to do with Iraqi oil. And so Operation Iraqi Liberation – also known by its acronym OIL – was launched. Then, lest some bright spark should see the obvious connection; by a rare instance of genius, the Bush administration changed the name of the operation.  It was then called Operation Iraqi Freedom. 
Never mind the fact that the first building secured in Baghdad by the invading American Army was the Iraqi Oil Ministry; Bush’s aim had always been noble and altruistic. And yes, I believe pigs can fly.
The “cake walk” invasion was launched. The “shock and awe” campaign was in full swing. While the battle was still raging, Bush, clad in full flight suit, landed on an aircraft carrier with banners proclaiming “Mission Accomplished”.
At that point in time, the Americans were still searching the length and breadth of Iraq for the illusive weapons of mass destruction; and the expected cheering crowds had not arrived to welcome the invaders. In fact, the ferocity of resistance took the Americans by “shock and awe”.
The extensive search for the non-existent weapons of mass destruction continued to dog Bush and Cheney. Despite, all evidence to the contrary, Bush and Cheney continued their mantra that Saddam did possess such weapons.
Iraq may have had its share of mushrooms and clouds, but experts have long concluded that Iraq did not have weapons that could cause mushroom clouds to rise.
Nevertheless, the ever optimistic and overly confident Bush embarked on his final journey to Iraq a few weeks ago. He was hell bent on finding those weapons that no one else could find and resolved to accomplish his mission.
Alas, Bush finally found those illusive weapons; they were right there in the safe and fortified Green Zone. They were launched in quick succession. In a matter of seconds, two of these weapons came flying straight at Bush’s face with better accuracy than his own arsenal of sophisticated modern weapons that keep causing collateral civilian death.
The lame duck President deftly ducked the flying missiles. The missile launcher was bundled away whining in pain from the instantaneous beating that was meted out.
Bush then reported that it was a size 10. A perfect 10 it was for the Iraqis and much of the Arab world.
A perfect end it was not for Bush.  In Eastern culture, to be pelted with shoes is the greatest of humiliation that can befall a leader.
Given the chance, Bushes spin masters not wanting to let a spin opportunity to go by would now say that Bush has finally uncovered the illusive destructive weapon of the masses and that this is what he sent his troops out for in the first place.
Had these weapons been left in the hands, or rather the feet, of Saddam the tyrant, untold misery would have befallen other leaders of the free world!
The launcher of the missiles, now hailed as a hero in the Arab world, is languishing in a jail having been beaten to a pulp in the best traditions of the civilised and democratically elected successors to Saddam.
The Iraqi authorities have very quickly destroyed the evidence, lest it should become the symbol of greater good to the Iraqi people. The destruction of historical artifacts in Iraq continues unabated. What a shame, those shoes belong in the Hall of Fame.
Maybe this incident was part of Bush’s secret economic plan to stimulate global economic growth. We will have to ask his spin doctors as this whole episode has brought some cheer in unexpected quarters.
The Turkish manufacturer of the infamous shoes is reported to have received orders for 300,000 pairs of the model now dubbed “Bush Boots”.  A large part of these orders are for size 10.
A definite perfect 10 to boot out this miserable failure. Mission accomplished indeed.