NOV 4 — As many of you should know, I am rather biased when it comes to writing about Malaysian politics.
Which side you may ask? Well my previous article should give you some clues so let’s just say you won’t see the word “rakyat” being mentioned much in my articles. But hey, at least I don’t go pretending on being all neutral or non-partisan like many of you out there, right here and right now.
My fellow readers please be aware that Zaidel Baharuddin can be somewhat biased, at least he dares to admit it and that probably makes him the only columnist here who has balls. Although, I have to give credit to Dina Zaman for she has balls too, and no I am not saying that she is actually a man; I mean she breaks fasts with some gangsters for the sake of orphans and that shows that she has more balls than many of us here who just sit behind the computer ranting and weeping about our woes and blame everything on Barisan Nasional. (Note from DZ: Okaylah Zaidel, I’ll be your cougar!)
Anyway ...
Recently there was this Perak fiasco which happened for the second time and only this time around the circus was contained. I believe in democracy and if some of the representatives decided that shouting and jumping like monkeys is the only way to demonstrate the true form of democracy then by all means go ahead. If these representatives feel that this is justified at the cost of their image then I guess that is one of the perils that a politician has to take.
When the first fiasco happened they were sitting under a tree. They even put a plaque under that tree and called it the Tree of Democracy. I do however have one small problem with the whole fiasco, in which the act of naming the tree ... The Tree of Democracy.
Just because they held a meeting under a tree and talked about politics the tree is now known as The Tree of Democracy. I, on the other hand, have conducted many meetings under a tree to talk about politics and I have yet to honour any of those trees. In fact I even go further by having a bowl of cendol jagung and sometimes a plate of rojak while discussing about politics and democracy under the shady tree at Taman Melawati Khan's cendol. And I have been doing this for years long before the Pakatan politicians ever thought of doing it. We must be thankful though that the Perak meeting was held under a tree and not some other dodgy places like... say beside a big drain. If not we would have a plaque there written "The Longkang of Democracy" or "The Bumbung Tempat Letak Motorsikal Staf Sahaja of Democracy"
So now I Zaidel Baharuddin, in the spirit of my fellow democrats in Perak, declare that the tree located at Khan's Cendol beside the main road of Taman Melawati as ... The Tree of Democracy, Cendol and Rojak...
It shall signify the time when my fellow part-time politicians and I practice our freedom of speech, freedom of blind accusation, freedom of gossiping, and making valid points based purely on perspectives, statutory declarations and what the taxi driver said while on the way back from Sungei Wang.
Then again this leaves me in a quagmire...
You see apart from the tree in front of Khan's Cendol, I also have memories of other discussions beneath other trees and one very significant discussion was held under a tree in Taman Permata. While Khan may be a place for politics, the tree at the Permata football field is where discussions are held on almost anything but politics, and for that sole reason this tree is significant to me because there is more to life than politics. For it was under that tree is where Joe Lee, Anthony Cheang, Peter Jambu and I, under one starry night with tropical winds blowing, had that discussion on “True Love” coupled with “Limau Nipis Ais”. Ahh yes, manly talks with feelings, thus as the author of “A Ramadan Love Story” it would be a sin if I do not honour that tree.
Thus I, Zaidel Baharuddin (again), in the spirit of love, declare that the tree located at the left most (if facing from Jalan Permata 4) of the back field of Taman Permata declare it as… The Tree of True Love.
Years shall pass by and the tree will have legendary status and it shall be a popular spot where people confess their love beneath it, something like the Tokimeki Memorial.
And just like the Perak incident, I too shall name the nearby trees to commemorate other significant events that happened around the area. The second tree after The Tree of True Love shall be named the Tree of Chelsea & Liverpool to commemorate the time when I witnessed the epic vocal battle between Khairul Khushairie, a hardcore fan of Liverpool, and Farid Donat, a diehard fan of Chelsea, on which club is better. Sadly though, that year Manchester United won the EPL.
Last but not least, I must honour the tree that is located in front of Restoran Mak Jem Taman Permata. In the spirit of Malaysian sports I shall name it “Pokok Datuk Lee Chong Wei” to commemorate the time when Arip and i saw Lee Chong Wei being beaten by Lin Dan in the 2008 Beijing Olympics. Arip could not stop swearing during the match. Lee is now a Datuk.
Conclusion?
Like the act of me giving name to trees, Malaysian politics is becoming more and more of a circus. Why? Because instead of serving the people our politicians are much more interested in creating dramas and incidents, and that goes for both sides of the fence. Some say this is a process of nurturing a healthy democracy while others say that we have never had this good, although that is very much debatable. But I think, no matter how much you try to mask it with words like democracy and freedom of speech I believe that many Malaysians out there share the same sentiment that I have in which we would like to say, just stop the drama and get to work!
Then again, you know what they say about politics, the thing you gotta know is, everything is showbiz.
P.S: Would you be willing to meet me under the tree of true love... Oiyooo..... My new pick-up line.
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