APRIL 15 — Recently, I was commissioned to produce a video news package for VJ Movement, a Dutch-based news agency focusing on solo-journalism.

It was about a matter that had intrigued me for some time now and this was the opportunity for me to explore it — homosexuality in Islam.

And so, I decided that I would interview a slew of people to get as many different opinions on the matter.

I met a Malay Muslim gay man who was willing to speak to me about this issue. However, he requested anonymity, fearing backlash.

“I have to suppress everything. I don’t have the freedom to think and practise what I feel is right for me,” said Ahmad (a pseudonym).

“And what are the effects on you?” I asked.

“I’m sure I can be diagnosed as clinically depressed. I have to always think that being happy is a sin.”

“Is homosexuality wrong according to Islam?”

“I’ve been brought up in Malaysia as a Muslim and it’s already been ingrained in me that being gay is a sin. But I am a Muslim, and I am also gay.”

“So you’re conflicted?”

“It’s a sad thought that God will punish me for something He made me do.”

The next person I interviewed was the director-general of Jakim (Malaysian Department of Islamic Development), Datuk Wan Mohamed.

“It’s very clear that Islamic teaching forbids homosexuality. So the focus now should be on preventing them from corrupting society,” Wan Mohamed responded.

“Datuk, what is your opinion on all the threats that were made towards Azwan Ismail by the public and media?” I asked.

“If a person declares that he is gay with pride and no remorse, then he should be treated harshly because he is trying to invite others to join him.”

“If homosexuality is a sin, wouldn’t Islam actually recommend a softer way to steer him towards the right path then?”

Wan Mohamed answers my questions with a very vague reply: “Different people require different techniques to handle them.”

Then, I decided to interview a human rights and Islamic syariah lawyer, Nizam Bashir.

“Although there are verses in the Quran that say homosexuality is wrong, there is a countervailing fundamental value in Islam that says no one can be compelled to do or believe in a particular thing,” replied Nizam.

“How conclusive is that?” I asked.

“Whatever actions that you take with regards to religious matters have to stem from yourself and it has to be sincere before it is accepted by Allah.”

So far, I had spoken only to Muslim individuals, I decided that I wanted to get the views of those from the outside — non-Muslims.

And so I got in touch with Pang Khee Teik, a sexual rights activist and organiser of the Seksualiti Merdeka group.

“Is homosexuality wrong according to Islam?” I asked.

“I don’t think it is Islam in itself, but a politicised interpretation of a particular form of Islam,” explained Pang.

“What does that mean?”

“This form of Islam in Malaysia does not allow for dissenting views nor intricate negotiations and interpretations. And it’s been put into place by those who want to stay in power.”

Pang introduced me to two non-Muslim gay men who decided to also come forward to share their stories with me when they heard I was doing this video story.

Josh Hong, a writer and a practising Christian, feels that he has been very lucky when it comes to being open with his homosexuality.

“My family is very supportive and so is my church pastor. But, of course, I had to find the right church that was accepting,” he told me.

“I’m not religious at all. But I’m happy because my family and friends accept me and support me no matter what,” said Tash Singh, a young college student.

Ahmad, on the other hand, believes he will never be able to come out as an openly gay man in Malaysia in his lifetime.

“If you come out to the wrong people, they can contact some kind of authority that will force you to go for courses to ‘correct yourself’,” he said.

Once my video news package was done, I still could not come to a conclusion about the issue of homosexuality and Islam.

I just hope that the environment we live in can start to be open to discourse, as required by Islam, and not just shun something that is difficult to understand.

Visit www.vjmovement.com to view the video “Being Gay and Muslim in Malaysia.”

* The views expressed here are the personal opinion of the columnist.